when you kiss it feels like love
it always feels like love and
suddenly, somebody is in love
with your laugh
and your eyes
the way you eat spaghetti
the way your smile is always crooked.
They’re in love and maybe
you’re someone who should be loved
(someone who deserves it)

But then there’s the tidal wave 
after three years or two months or six months and four days,
when suddenly they look at you
and your laugh isn’t anything special
and the way your eyes line with laughter at the sides
no longer does anything for them

It’s falling and it’s screaming and it’s
then why the fuck did you say all those things in the first place,
oh god, oh my god,
it’s becoming the one they used to love or
at least you think because 
well you’re not really sure how they felt
not anymore but
(they had to have meant it, right? right?)

It’s nostalgic and addictive
and it’s your ripped up heart on the ground 
it’s remembering the way crooked smiles used to make them laugh
and now makes them look away